Review of Fatal Addiction
The Current Title – How catchy is it? How well does it convey the information in the manuscript?
“Fatal Addiction” is a compelling title for this story, and a nice play on words for ‘fatal attraction.’
The Current Synopsis – How catchy is it? Does it intrigue?
You might want to look at some suggestions that I’ve made to your synopsis. The point of this piece of writing is to show the reader (the publisher) what your story is about so that they can decide if it’s something that they’re likely to read and publish. You want to summarize the contents of the story as well as introduce the main characters. But you will want to avoid talking about your book as though you were giving a book report – show your creativity so that you can stand out from the other manuscripts that a publisher will receive.
The Current Length of the Work – Is it appropriate for the target market?
Normally, a publisher will want to know the word count, so be sure to determine that. Right now, it seems to be the proper length for a novel submission.
What is the power of the opening 3-5 sentences?
This is a fantastic way to begin. You have the reader in a spellbinding description of an execution, which makes them want to know more about what happens next.
Dialogue (if any) – Describe and comment.
My only concern with your dialogue is that it’s not entirely clear who is speaking at any given time. You want to make sure that your reader can open up your book at any point and know how many people are talking. In this section, it almost seems that you have three people speaking, but I don’t think that’s true. You can clear this up by including some references to the speaker or by keeping the words spoken by one character together.
Mechanics – Grammar:
Your grammar is excellent, consistent, and concise.
Mechanics – Spelling:
I did not notice any spelling errors.
Mechanics – Punctuation:
The punctuation looked fine to me.
Mechanics – Formatting:
I will attach the current formatting guidelines for a novel submission.
Is there a need for illustrations? (Children’s, non-fiction, etc.)
N/A
Other / Conclusion
I was absolutely spellbound by this manuscript. You have created interesting and believable characters that go through ‘real life’ struggles that anyone can relate to – drug history or not. I think that you genuinely understand how to portray human nature and all of its misgivings, instead of trying to use it to ‘make’ a story. This is a story that unfolds on its own – almost as though it’s writing itself as a reader reads it.
Well done and good luck!
Other work by this author:
