The Innocents Abroad

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CHAPTER XV. French National Burying--Ground--Among the Great Dead--The Shrine of Disappointed Love--The Story of Abelard and Heloise--"English Spoken Here"--"American Drinks Compounded Here"--Imperial Honors to an American--The Over-estimated Grisette--Departure from Paris--A Deliberate Opinion Concerning the Comeliness of American Women

CHAPTER XVI. Versailles--Paradise Regained--A Wonderful Park--Paradise Lost --Napoleonic Strategy

CHAPTER XVII. War--The American Forces Victorious--" Home Again"--Italy in Sight The "City of Palaces"--Beauty of the Genoese Women--The "Stub-Hunters" --Among the Palaces--Gifted Guide--Church Magnificence--"Women not Admitted"--How the Genoese Live--Massive Architecture--A Scrap of Ancient History--Graves for 60,000

CHAPTER XVIII. Flying Through Italy--Marengo--First Glimpse of the Famous Cathedral --Description of some of its Wonders--A Horror Carved in Stone----An Unpleasant Adventure--A Good Man--A Sermon from the Tomb--Tons of Gold and Silver--Some More Holy Relics--Solomon's Temple

CHAPTER XIX "Do You Wiz zo Haut can be?"--La Scala--Petrarch and Laura--Lucrezia Borgia--Ingenious Frescoes--Ancient Roman Amphitheatre--A Clever Delusion--Distressing Billiards--The Chief Charm of European Life--An Italian Bath--Wanted: Soap--Crippled French--Mutilated English--The Most Celebrated Painting in the World--Amateur Raptures--Uninspired Critics --Anecdote--A Wonderful Echo--A Kiss for a Franc

CHAPTER XX Rural Italy by Rail--Fumigated, According to Law--The Sorrowing Englishman--Night by the Lake of Como--The Famous Lake--Its Scenery --Como compared with Tahoe--Meeting a Shipmate

CHAPTER XXI. The Pretty Lago di Lecco--A Carriage Drive in the Country--Astonishing Sociability in a Coachman--Sleepy Land--Bloody Shrines--The Heart and Home of Priestcraft--A Thrilling Mediaeval Romance--The Birthplace of Harlequin--Approaching Venice

CHAPTER XXII. Night in Venice--The "Gay Gondolier"--The Grand Fete by Moonlight --The Notable Sights of Venice--The Mother of the Republics Desolate

CHANTER XXIII. The Famous Gondola--The Gondola in an Unromantic Aspect--The Great Square of St. Mark and the Winged Lion--Snobs, at Home and Abroad--Sepulchres of the Great Dead--A Tilt at the "Old Masters"--A Contraband Guide --The Conspiracy--Moving Again

CHAPTER XXIV. Down Through Italy by Rail--Idling in Florence--Dante and Galileo--An Ungrateful City--Dazzling Generosity--Wonderful Mosaics--The Historical Arno--Lost Again--Found Again, but no Fatted Calf Ready--The Leaning Tower of Pisa--The Ancient Duomo--The Old Original First Pendulum that Ever Swung--An Enchanting Echo--A New Holy Sepulchre--A Relic of Antiquity--A Fallen Republic--At Leghorn--At Home Again, and Satisfied, on Board the Ship--Our Vessel an Object of Grave Suspicion--Garibaldi Visited--Threats of Quarantine

CHAPTER XXV. The Works of Bankruptcy--Railway Grandeur--How to Fill an Empty Treasury--The Sumptuousness of Mother Church--Ecclesiastical Splendor --Magnificence and Misery--General Execration--More Magnificence A Good Word for the Priests--Civita Vecchia the Dismal--Off for Rome

CHAPTER XXVI. The Modern Roman on His Travels--The Grandeur of St. Peter's--Holy Relics --Grand View from the Dome--The Holy Inquisition--Interesting Old Monkish Frauds--The Ruined Coliseum--The Coliseum in the Days of its Prime --Ancient Playbill of a Coliseum Performance--A Roman Newspaper Criticism 1700 Years Old

CHAPTER XXVII. "Butchered to Make a Roman Holiday"--The Man who Never Complained --An Exasperating Subject--Asinine Guides--The Roman Catacombs The Saint Whose Fervor Burst his Ribs--The Miracle of the Bleeding Heart --The Legend of Ara Coeli

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